Someone vigilant asked me this last week about my ring. Not about it specifically but why it was a different ring than the one I received on my wedding day. That one, very different from this one, is 14k white gold. This one shows up almost black on my finger so it stands out. So it didn’t surprise me when he asked me but surprised me that he was the first one to ask in the last 6 months.
It’s not that I wanted a new ring and outside of my Apple watch and Road ID I don’t wear or care about jewelry. Really if my watch wasn’t so techy I wouldn’t wear one and with having kids I force myself to wear a Road ID with how much I ride on back country roads. Even though Laura felt some guilt at how nice her rings that I bought her, the matching set, and the materials being some of the top out there, it didn’t bother me that my ring she gave me on our wedding day was so simple and inexpensive. See I’m more sentimental and the purpose and reason for the ring far outweigh how nice or expensive it is.
Well, that changed starting a few years ago. I started noticing, mainly at night, that my finger around and under the ring would itch or swell up on a normal day, not after exercising or being outside. I didn’t think too much about it but it gradually got worse and worse and more persistent. I tried, upon Laura’s recommendation to take my ring off at night and, although it was a temporary Band-Aid on a much bigger problem, it did give some short term relief. It got to the point 6 months ago I just took off the ring and clipped it to my bag I carry around every day and stopped wearing it. What I didn’t realize was there is such a thing as developed allergies to gold rings. Really it’s the metal they mix with gold to make it stronger, which is even more of an interesting point.
Towards Christmas last year Laura surprised me with this new ring. I was extremely reluctant at first, because it wasn’t the ring she gave me at our wedding. But after not having worn my wedding band that long and after talking it through with Laura I decided to give it a try. She said it is a symbol not just a memory and this new ring has even more symbolism than the last, even though it was there on our wedding day. This ring symbolized the continued commitment to our marriage and the choice to love when it’s hardest. The ring is a mixture of tungsten metal, which is extremely hard and durable, with some more rare burl cherry wood on the inside. There have been many times over the last 8 years of marriage we would both like to forget and there are scars or burls on our relationship but overall marriage is a bond and covenant that is more durable and outlasts all of those flaws, problems and obstacles we have had and will have.
Chris and Laura